Dear Co-Worker,

Good morning. What a pleasure to see you on the bus this morning!

That's called sarcasm.

It was not a pleasure to see you on the bus this morning. Well, it wasn't awful actually seeing you, but the you trying to make conversation thing is where the pleasure ended.

Let me explain.

We talk at work. All the time. You and everyone else gather at my desk to talk about your lives and complaints about work. And at work, that is okay. In fact it's more than okay because one of my job duties is to be your friend. Those are my bosses words.

That friendship ends outside our big metal office doors. It also does not exist before I walk through those big metal doors early in the morning.

I am an actress/improvisor/writer/musician it is hard enough for me to run reports and mess with numbers all day. I need my iPod time in the morning to psych myself up. I don't want to talk to you. It's not personal. Promise.

Well, for some of you it is personal. But that's for another letter.

Regards,
Molly

Some People Have Too Much Time On Their Hands

And to them I say,

Thank you.

Day=Made.

It's early. I am only an hour into my workday, but my day is already complete.

I work near The British School Of Chicago (also near Cabrini Green...woot!). Many a morning I see the childrens in their uniforms walking to school.

On this particular morning a dad and daughter were walking in front of me. They were talking and the little girl was waving her arms wildly and freely. They both began to move a little more excitedly and as they walked, turned to each other and high-fived. Small as that may seem, it may be the sweetest thing I've seen happen in awhile. I was reminded of my dad, (what up Frank!) taking me to school, and how special and awesome it was.

Awwwwwwwwww....

Later on in the walk I passed them from the other side of the street. The dad let the girl walk by herself to the front of the school, and he walked away before the other kids could see him. I'm sure it was because the daughter felt "cooler" that way. In one morning he showed her love AND gave her some independence. That's a special dad.

I miss my dad. When do I get to hug him? Oh yeah...NEXT WEEK!!!! Yaaaaaaaaaaay!

Get ready Chicago. Frank and Karen are coming to rock you silly.

Morning Think Time

I do most of my thinking in the morning. I am a certified over-thinker anyway, so the fact that I start out my day thinking generally leads to bad results.

That being said, I made a personal discovery this morning. There is a good chance I've become someone I used to hate (shudder).

I have resigned myself to that fact that I indeed become more and more like my mother as I get older. I can handle it. I like mom. I have also resigned to the fact that I am more sensitive than I would like to admit. Yes, sometimes I tear up over work things that are not personal, they're "business." Yeah. I get upset sometimes at work. Whatevs. Right?

But then this morning, I became the "slider." This I can't deal with.

I used to work at a coffee shop. I would rise every morning at 4:30am and serve coffee to the business people with bad morning breath. Surprsingly, most people do not brush their teeth as well as you think they would in the morning. People were grumpy, smelly, hung-over, sweaty among other gross things but I smiled and didn't really care.

The only thing that used to kill me was the "slider." The "slider" is a person who can't pick up their money from the counter to put it in my hand. They just slide it across, look up at me and smile. They may not seem like a big deal, but it's rude. I actually became aware of the rudeness of this gesture when I absentmindley did it to a customer. Sliding your money across the counter says to the Barista, "I don't want to touch your dirty coffee hands. You're doing me a favor. You can pick up the money yourself."

I "slid" this morning. I was at Intelligensia, and I "slid" my receipt to the cashier, looked up at her and smiled. I saw the hatred of my gesture run through her eyes. I "slid" the receipt and the pen, right at her.

I obviously have been thinking about this since it happened. I feel like a jerk. I can't believe I would do that. I'm sorry Intelligensia lady. I didn't mean it. I totally respect you. I feel for you and your coffee serving duties. I'm sorry. Don't spit in my coffee. Please.

Well...

...even I can do that.

Fafarazzi: It's sick.

I love Fafarazzi.

It's like fantasy baseball, only instead of hoping your player plays well, you hope your celebrity screws up and has a drunken night out with hookers and crack cocaine.

Last year I played, but worked a certain un-named coffee shop, so internet access was limited.

This year I work in an office. At a desk. With internet.

I'm also very excited about my team. It's only the beginning and I sense some trading by the end of the week BUT I have a good feeling about several of my peeps. Check out my roster:

Angelina Jolie
Tom Cruise
Pete Doherty
Victoria Beckham
Kim Kardashian
Brody Jenner
Liv Tyler
Lily Allen
Gwyneth Paltrow
Tony Romo

Not a bad start. It's still too early to tell what will happen, but I'm pumped. Now come Gwyneth, get crazy drunk and throw Liv Tyler from a balcony.

Kidding of course...

Some Tidbits.

Have you ever heard the song 1000 Times by Tahiti 80?

If you haven't you should listen to it. Make sure you listen to it on the train. Why? Because if everyone on the train were to break into dance, that's the song that would play.

Also, organic cleaning products don't work as well as regular ones. They never will. I convince myself that "this time they'll work!" They don't.